Ok Ladies, let's have it:

Where in the hell do I find a guy? I am divorced, and found my ex-husband at work (we worked in different depts at the hospital), so I am hesitant to date anyone from work, not that that's been a subject I've had to decide on lately. Does online dating work for anyone (my aunt met her bf on a bbw site, and now she's living with him, in spite of her own better judgement)? Should I look to date someone at work because I practically live there (especially with the holidays coming up)? I am not a social butterfly by any means - give me a pool table and a dive bar anytime vs a club. I have no idea how to actually approach a guy, and apparently guys find me intimidating (so I've been told numerous times over the years). I would at the very least like to start dating again, but have absolutely no idea how to go about it... So help, please!!!

Thanks ladies!

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Where can you find a guy? Anywhere! A guy that's worth it? That's luck.

I met my boyfriend at work. Except I was the cashier at a small grocery/deli and he was a customer. He moved right next door to my store and became a regular customer, so I'd see him everyday. Oh gosh, he was so cute. My heart fluttered when he walked in the door.

It took a year and a half of flirting and daily 60 second conversations about what to have for dinner, but I finally asked him out. It's been 3 years and we're still together!

So I guess my point is, you never know where Mr. Right will show up. It made my day whenever this cute customer came in to buy food, but I didn't think anything would happen for real. The store is closed now and we're actually doing long-distance, but the second I see him on our regular Skype calls, it still makes my day.

You're a cutie, you'll find your new man. He's just playing hard to get :-P

I met my man online (cupid.com), I like to say that internet dating is the 21st century equivalent to making eye contact across a crowded room ;) We have been together for 4.5 years and have a 3 year old together,  I was incredibly lucky to find him, he is a great man, wonderful father, he has "adopted" my older daughter who is 5 (she was 10 months old when we met, and he is the only father she has ever known).  As with anything, the results are hit or miss.  I had met some D.B.s on there, went on a few horrible dates, but in the end it was all worth it.  I think that the first step is simply putting yourself out there.  Set up a profile on a local dating website, go out on the weekends to a quiet bar (quiet is more condusive to meeting people, no yelling over loud music), go to places you feel comfortable that is frequented by people you would want to meet.  I would stay away from nightclubs, they are only frequented by drunk 21 year olds.  Practice your "come hither" face, be casual, and have fun!  When a woman is comfortable and having fun, men are drawn to that energy. Good luck!

Congrats on your relationship Cela! That is awesome - as someone who's a single mom as well, I know how important that relationship between your eldest and your man is and the fact that he's a dad for her is awesome (I' out of words this morning, apparently).

The "practice your come hither face" had me lmao... Thanks for the advice. Going to a club was never an option for me - too many drunks, not enough space. My anxiety level goes up just thinking about it (and it was never something I did when I was younger either). There is a dive bar right next (kinda) to work that I've been thinking about going to... And I was already thinking about an online profile, but I wanted to get the advice of some others who'd been there and done that... So thank you!!

I met my current boyfriend online. But the one before him I met at a coffee shop knitting. He was so intrigued by what I was doing that he came over and started chatting to me about it. I asked him if he wanted a lesson.. declined but asked if I wanted dinner. we dated for 2 years.  Just being out and about is key. Good Luck!! 

My usual advice to friends is to take an evening class in something that interests you.  You get the enjoyment of learning about something you like (or a new skill--my favorite is foreign language classes).  Plus, if you happen to meet new people in the class, you already have that interest in common.  Since I live near Chicago, I also advise friends to go to the SummerDance festival, where they have free dance lessons four nights a week during the summer, followed by live music to show off the skills you learned.  If you dress for dancing (say, a sexy red dress and modest heels), in my experience, you'll quickly find a partner!  If they have anything like that near you, I think you might find it worth a try!

Thanks ladies - those sound like do-able suggestions too... Ok, ok, ok... I can do this... (who knew it was going to be this hard? I don't remember it being this difficult when I was younger, lol)

Here's a cool little hangout that my hubby host's ...... friendly crowd. Who knows , Mr Right might be waiting ?  

http://www.facebook.com/groups/114075535291210/?ref=ts

Thanks Miss Bambo - sent in my join request!!

My boyfriend's brother met his now wife online nearly 10 years ago! They've been married 5 years, so I wouldn't completely rule out internet dating.

But other than that, no advice from me. I am hopeless with boys, this beau I've had for 3 years is my first boyfriend.

If I get back into the dating world, I'm definitely doing the online thing. It just is so helpful for screening out men that don't share the same values and such as yopurself. For example: I know that I'm not willing to date anyone who has minor children. With online dating-- that's an option that is already placed there so you automatically weed through those with kids.

Others have MUST HAVE requirements that they need and online dating helps with that. If you want to get married, you don't want to waste 2 years of your life with someone that doesn't believe in that. You get to be upfront and honest about what you're looking for. I think the biggest thing to keep in mind is that others have the same right to be upfront about what they want as well. So, you can't take it to heart if they prefer someone who is into Metallica and wants to follow them on tour & you're a homebody.

If you live in a large enough city, I think meetup.com is wonderful- not just for meeting guys, but people in general. It's not meeting people on the internet, but you get to go out for interesting events with people that have things in common with you. However, weirdly enough I would not recommend a singles group- I tried that in Chicago a long time ago, and mostly it was swingers- not that there's anything wrong with that. I would just recommend a large general group that has lots of events.

I agree with the screening of online sites... it is a great way to screen out those not compatible with what I want... and I had never heard of meetup.com; sounds like a great idea in general. i think i'll look into it (I live in LA, so there can't be any reason it wouldn't be out here).

Thanks again ladies... It all helps!!

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