I know that this is a really intimate topic for a lot of people, but I was wondering if there were any girls here who have had plastic surgery who might feel comfortable enough to share their experiences?
I really want a nose job but I am terrified of the whole process. I am confident with all other parts of my body and face with the exception of my nose. It is just the ugliest thing ever and ruins my entire face. All of my other features are ruined because of it and it has ruined my self confidence long enough. Please note, if you look at my photos on here you will think that I don't need it, but this is only because none of the photos show me in profile! I would never post photos of myself in profile...
Basically, it's long and it's hooked. It's not straight and small like Grace Kelly's. Please understand I don't need to be told about how beauty is on the "inside" or how it's beautiful to be "unique" looking! Everyone finds different things beautiful! For me, symmetrical facial features come before weight or anything else!
I am 21 now and I feel like I am wasting my life by this one bit of ugliness that can be rectified with cosmetic surgery. The only problem is that I am so scared because I have no idea what to expect! I've never met anyone who has had any sort of cosmetic surgery so I am wondering if there is anyone here that might know anything about it. Or even have a friend or family member who has had it!
So ladies, if one of you out here would feel comfortable to open up to me about your experience, it would really mean the world :)
Thanks for reading this <3
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Hi Harlow -
Personally, I think there is SOMETHING that each woman would have "done" for themselves... For me, as I lose weight, I have a waddle. And since I am only 35, I would really like to have it removed when I hit a weight plateau. I totally understand what you mean, it's a personal thing, and it isn't something someone else can understand. Don't get me wrong, love yourself, blah blah blah, but you seem to already get that.
I just read an entire LA Style on plastic surgery, lol. There is a movie they cited more than once as the definitive plastic surgery reality info: Beauty CULTure. It might be worth it to check it out, and then you would know what is actually involved - from beginning to end.
Good luck to you!!
Great advice Jenn! :) It's a difficult topic. I tend to try and advise against it just because I have seen some alarming statistics but it is a personal thing and I think that the decision relies on whether the pain outweighs the results. I wanted a nose job at one point and even now I don't really love my nose but the pain factor and the surgery freaks me out and I wouldn't even consider it at this point. I also think that it's important to try and make only minor changes - also to avoid the whole michael jackson effect :P
I'm 24 and I have always hated my nose too but I don't think surgery is the solution. It is a serious and expensive surgery and why is it affecting your self esteem? Probably because of the conception of beauty we are surrounded by every day. I am studying sociology and I'm learning a lot about this stuff and I would urge you to reconsider because EVERYONE has something they don't like and it's your attitude that will make the difference to your self esteem. I HAVE MAN FEET! I hate them! They look like big troll feet and I have been self conscious about them for over a decade. What can I do about it? Nothing. If there wasn't a solution to your nose then you wouldn't be in a position where you can actually alter it. I know how you feel, I really do, but sometimes it's better to try and accept a feature than to change it because the pain and suffering might not be worth it. I'm not saying you wouldn't feel awesome after it - I'd probably look cuter with a nose job too! And I have thought that numerous times. But then I could also have perkier boobs, a perfect stomach, more of an ass...
PS I have had a form of surgery and it wasn't pleasant waking up in pain :( It was keyhole because doctors suspected I had endometriosis but I didn't. I live in Brisbane too :D If your nose is nice from the front, I think you should try to learn to see more positives in it than think it ruins your look. That's a bit of an overreaction I feel.. What about the people with deformities or those who are midgets etc? Yeah I know it doesn't make you necessarily feel better and I'm not trying to use guilt, I'm just suggesting that if people with more severe issues can learn to live with it and be ok with it, maybe you can give yourself some more time to consider it. Trust me I understand where you are coming from and my friend said I had a big nose the other day lol!! I just thought it was more funny than anything but it took me a long time to get here and although I'm not much older than you, a couple more years makes a difference :) I was telling people from uni about the nose thing too and while I get a little self conscious, it's so much better to laugh about something like that and honestly other people mostly don't even notice!
Okay how do I explain this without sounding totally insane? Well, I have a really attractive boyfriend. Really, really attractive. People are always coming up to us and are pretty much asking "are you a model" all the time. And I hate it. It makes me feel so ugly and unworthy of him because I have this ugly nose and not model good looks like he does. It makes being around him painful. And yes, so he does see me for who I am and my nose doesn't bother him and all that jazz - but I can tell that other girls are thinking "oh why is he with that ugly bitch, he could do so much better". I constantly feel judged by other people because I am so ugly and unworthy of him. Recently an older woman (like in her 60s) came up to me and was like "oh you are so lucky to have him, he is so beautiful" and ect. And it KILLED my self esteem. Because here was this person telling me YOU ARE SO UGLY, I CANNOT FATHOM WHY AN ADONIS LIKE HIM WOULD BE WITH AN UGLY COW LIKE YOU".
Anyway, I could go on, but I think you get why this is so important to me! I want to get married soon, and I want people to look at our wedding photos and think "wow, what beautiful, perfect people", rather than "oh, he could do SO much better". I don't want to be haunted by ugly wedding photos.
Harlow do you realised that you are basically letting other people tell you how to feel about yourself? You feel judged by other people and 'ugly' because you have a boyfriend who you claim is so much more attractive than you. Ugly and unworthy of him? This sounds like a self esteem issue more than anything and what if you get a nose job and people still act like that? Your attitude towards yourself just seems concerning especially because you said a lady told you how lucky you were to be with him and you interpreted it as calling you ugly/unattractive..
I had a similar surgery (I do have endometriosis though, it's now spread into my intestines) so I know that groggy shitty feeling- I ended up with a panic attack because I just couldn't breathe through my mouth. it was awful.
that being said if someone has the money, the time, and the want to get their nose fixed who we are to say it's a bad idea and that there are people worse off? of course there are people who are worse off who can't afford PUG items, who don't live in a safe place, have food on the table, but that doesn't stop people from buying what they want right?
changing a piece of ones body isn't up to and shouldn't be up to anyone else. I get asking a generalized question, but outright guilting someone "what about midgets! and the deformed!" is really out of line.
you don't want surgery? sweet! don't get it. don't shame those who have made the choice to do so.
@ Sandy - I don't appreciate you taking my comment out of context. I actually said "What about the people with deformities or those who are midgets etc? Yeah I know it doesn't make you necessarily feel better and I'm not trying to use guilt, I'm just suggesting that if people with more severe issues can learn to live with it and be ok with it, maybe you can give yourself some more time to consider it."
My point is that if people with severe issues can be ok with them maybe it's worth trying self acceptance before surgery!!!! I also said that I used to HATE my nose so at least I tried to relate to the girl asking for advice, you just attacked my comment after I SPECIFICALLY SAID that my point was that if people can accept something like a deformity. I am the last person to use one of those stupid examples to make someone appreciate their own life. It's like saying to someone who is going through depression that they are lucky they have food - it doesn't make them feel better or do anything helpful. Also my comment wasn't targeted at you either so I don't know why you felt you had to reply to me.
because your comment was 100 percent out of line.
one you're assuming people who have deformities are happy and content and have accepted them. it's a blanket generalized statement that really no one has any place saying.
two you're comparing apples and oranges. awesome you found love with your nose, the OP hasn't get over it.
she isn't asking you for permission. and as said before, if you don't want surgery awesome. don't try to guilt someone who isn't happy into not getting it, you aren't their parents, their doctor, etc. so move on quietly.
I was not addressing you in the first place yet you have just been rude and acted all offended. If you have a problem, keep it to yourself! Who are you to say I have no place saying this? Freedom of speech. That is all.
I'm offended because you attempted to guilt someone over a personal choice with the whole 'THINK OF THE FREAKS! THINK OF THE DEFORMED!' that is totally, and utterly out of line.
you absolutely do not have ANY say to what this young woman does with her body, because it is HER Body and HER choice- you seem to be missing that point completely.
How self involved you are taking everything personally as if it is targeted at you.